“Noooo! Nooooo!!” he screams. I sigh and watch his tiny naked body retreat down the hall, legs moving faster than physics. The diaper will have to wait.

Cohabitating with my two-year-old is a constant exercise in trying to anticipate and then influence someone who knows exactly what he wants and doesn’t … and feels he has all the time in the world to negotiate it.

If Dylan hears that he can have 1 more minute, his immediate response is, “How about 3”?

If “No, you can’t eat that peach right now,” then it’s, “One little bite and then all done!”

And if it’s a firm “no” and I don’t immediately distract him afterwards, he’s relentless. (Enough to make Chinese water torture seem familiar.)

But that’s not what this note is about.

This is about the other times - usually when he’s finally asleep - when I can marvel at his strong sense of self and reflect on the bigger picture:

When do we learn to stop asking for and lobbying for what we really want?

(Especially as women.)

...When was the last time you felt shame about being “too pushy”?

...When was the last time you decided it just wasn’t worth the effort?

...When have you put your needs on the back burner so you don’t have to risk a “no”?

Ohhh, that one little super-powerful word. No.

When did it become a source of such embarrassment? When did a no come to mean that YOU had failed? Or worse - that you are a failure?

Nos happen. Maybe you’ll hear one when you ask for…

Better division of labor with your partner
A raise or a sale
An extended payment plan or other creative arrangement
An interview or mentorship with an expert
Some “quiet time” from your toddler

But comparatively, how many more yeses would you hear?

And what would that mean for you over the course of your life?

Here’s to reawakening the best part of your uninhibited inner two-year-old,

Jenna

P.S. I'M TAKING ON ONE NEW PRIVATE CLIENT IN AUGUST. Are you the one? Let's chat about it.